Happiness needs to be chosen every day all over again. You don’t wake up one day, and feel happy for the rest of your life. You don’t all of a sudden love yourself, love your surroundings and feel peace and joy.
It’s a constant battle. Some days easier – other days so hard, you’re exhausted of even the thought of trying. And you don’t have to. Even the happiest, the most positive person in the world sometimes doubts everything, feels lost and then – makes a choice.
Today I’ve felt a bit lost and unorganized – and I hate that. It’s my favorite season of the year, but it’s combined to the most stressful time of the year too. It’s that time of the year, when I put myself in a glass box up in the air – and examine everything I’ve done this year. And I’m quick to judge. Was I good? Did I do good? Was I… perfect?
I know – I always say how I am not perfect. How it’s okay. But that doesn’t mean, that I don’t have those thoughts, that they wouldn’t slip in my mind. So whenever I’m asking myself questions, that are impossible to answer to even to begin with – I stop and I make a choice. I make a choice not to focus on that thing, not to doubt myself and not to ask too much of myself.
I take a few steps, stop and look at my surroundings.
I’m crazy lucky.
And I’m crazy for expecting myself to be a super human sometimes. I’m not – and I don’t even want to be, remember?
I want to be the regular girl I am, to live my life day by day, sometimes morning by morning. One meal at a time, since other days that feels like such a struggle. I mean, if I was filthy rich, would I have a personal chef in my house? Probably. Though to be fair – I’ve learned to cook quite a bit this year (meaning, that I now cook other things than salad too).
But besides the glass box, super powers and salads – I did have a point in this text, or at least some more sentences for you to read.
Remember this: Happiness needs to be chosen every day all over again. And it’s not always about feeling joy. It’s also about being patient with yourself – to cut some slack and being realistic with your life.
And if that means a one day of self-doubt, anxiety and tiredness – so be it. They might not be the best feelings in the world, but they are yours and they come with the package. The one package, that life has perfected for you.
All you need to do is choose to pick it up.
photos Tiia Ennala
How is your life at the moment? I hope there’s not too much Christmas-stress?
Also – since we’re talking about Christmas packages – have you already participated in the giveaway on my facebook page? (For everyone living in Finland.)