I am 1 %

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Late one night I entertained myself by taking a personality test. It’s always fun to see if the results actually fit you, right?

Well, first of all, the questions were hard. I found myself worrying, if I answered all the questions right. Ridiculous, I know. Also something that just is a part of my personality: perfectionism. Even though I always talk about embracing my imperfections – it’s not as easy as said.

I also thought: what if I don’t like the results? What if the test says I’m something I’m not?

As if a piece of text would determine who I am. Again – ridicilous.

But I took the test anyway. I read the results and I was speechless (well, it would have been selfish to wake up the man sleeping next to me anyway).

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The results were shockingly accurate. I wanted to take notes of them and show them to my friends: this is why I am like this! See? This is me right here. And at the same time I wanted to never share those personal things with anyone. Na-ah. They knew too much already.

So naturally I did the only thing I know: write about it – here on my blog. No one reads this anyway, right? Google analytics, what do you mean the visitors are growing? Shh.

What was most shocking about the text was probably the fact, that it told me I was a part of 1 %. Special. Is that what you tell all your dates? 

I know I’m not that special – or I mean – aren’t we all?

But somehow that felt right, because I had indeed felt like I didn’t belong. For a long time.

Like I was sitting on the other side of the table, while everyone else was opposite. Like I was listening to the radio and hearing a channel, that no one else seemed to notice. Like I was seeing more colors, than others. And sometimes, speaking a language, that not one person understood.

Lonely. Yeah, I’ve been there.

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But is it really, because of this one personality type, that describes me perfectly?
Is it just because of the these cards, that were given to me at birth?

I don’t know. But if it was, I would be relieved to understand that part of me a bit better.  And if not, I guess the site got some new information of me and will now hopefully show me better ads.

Because I learned the next day, that you shouldn’t always click on everything you see on Facebook. Somehow my man wasn’t as excited about this test and the results, when he couldn’t be sure about it’s safety. Oops.

Luckily he sits next to me at the table, listens to the same radio as I do, notices the different shifts of colors and yeah – speaks the same language as me (besides understanding and translating tech to me).

I don’t know what the purpose of this text was. Not really.

That 1 % of me though – I bet that knows exactly.

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