Another year over

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I can’t shake the feeling that I should write something about last year. Something amazing, to tell you how much I’ve accomplished or how much I’ve traveled or just to highlight my year of 2016.

Somehow I want to wait.. I wish it was actually next year and I could tell you about all the things I hoped for and how they came through. Oh how I wish I could have done better and this year would have been the best year of all. But here we are – it’s already page 4 of 2017 and I’m not sure how to put my feelings into words.

I loved Christmas but as soon as it was over I felt a bit lost. The new year was coming and it wasn’t so much about those big promises or the next big page (okay, maybe a little bit of that too) but it was about looking back and saying bye to the past year.

What would I say? 2016 – you went by fast.2016collage2

It wasn’t all uphill. I realized my job wasn’t the job I signed for, I suffered from a burnout and for some time I felt a bit lost. But something good came out of it. I think I found what I wanted to do and I got new energy to do it. I became an entrepreneur.  That doesn’t happen every year, right? I started to focus on my writing, beauty and this blog. Already I’ve got to work with some brilliant brands and there are some proud moments, a lot of learning and a hunger for more.

Maybe that’s what’s keeping me of declaring 2016 an awesome one and being all excited about it. The hunger for more, the passion for being better and always improving.  It’s just funny ’cause I know I’ll never be done. There’s always room for more, for better. And for a perfectionist it’s all the more work: to find the perfect balance to get the best out of yourself.

I wrote some of this to my newsletter that I sent before Christmas but I have to write my favorite quote here again. ‘Cause it will be my one and only new year’s promise.

“Burn brightly without burning out.”
Richard Biggs

‘Cause if you burn it all out there will be no room for light. And the light, the fire is what keeps me going.

xx Charlotta

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Just to remind myself and to cheer this post up a bit – I want to share some highlights of my year.  ‘Cause If I really look back and focus on all the details.. I did pretty good. (Don’t tell Charlotta!)

I got to travel to Paris with my sisters and it was a dream come through. I’ve never laughed so much! Paris look: Spicy.

I spent a sunny holiday in Rodos. I remember drinking wine, eating pizza and being just so happy I shed a few happy tears. Rodos Highlights.

I traveled to Riga and for a few nights I got to live like a royal. My trip in Riga, Latvia.

I realized things and decided to write honestly to you. About being a woman ,  Feeling blue ,  About life and dreaming , What If I fall?

I gave up pills and got acne instead. But then I somewhat battled it (and shared pics of my naked face). About birth control pills , I am not perfect, How I treat my acne, Skin update after tretinoin

I achieved some of my fitness goals. I’ve been running like crazy and loving it. I can do a proper push up.  I’ve lost some weight.

Also – I’ve slowly found my style! There aren’t so many outfit posts but I do update my outfits every now and then on instagram. Check me out.

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How was your year? Or if asking it makes you only uncomfortable –  know that I understand and we’ll both be better next year!

What if I fall?

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img_3090-2You know how it goes – oh, but my darling, what if you fly?

It sounds beautiful, easy and something that doesn’t hurt or cause sleeplessness. It’s a wonderful thing when there’s only one way to go and it’s up. It’s actually quite obvious – just like any other inspirational quote – especially if you read it at a bad time. Something is bad but at the end everything is wonderful.

But what if everything is bad and nothing is wonderful? What if you confuse the two? And what if something is bad but at the end everything is not wonderful, not beautiful.. but okay.img_2912

Flying might not hurt but falling does. It’s scary enough to stumble, to realize that you’re not perfect and to end up your face on the ground.  But to truly fall is the scariest thing of all. Falling once might not be that bad. Falling twice might hold you back.. but falling three times makes you lose your high heels and sometimes even crawl on your knees.

What if I fall? What if everything I ever hoped for was always there but I never bothered to look?

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You know the answer but it’s forgotten so easily. It needs repeating over and over again and sometimes what’s enough is hearing it from someone else. ‘Cause the only thing that really holds you back, the only thing that makes you afraid of even trying, the only enemy you ever really had..

is you.

Flying might not hurt but it sure as hell ain’t easy. It just so happens that it’s the only thing I ever wanted so I’m willing to try. So for the question I asked you at first let me answer you:

If I fly, it’s gonna be beautiful and awesome, and I’ll love it. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t get down anymore though. That would be impossible. I shall always come back down – even just to kick myself in the back and to dare to do it again.

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Photos Inka Lähteenaro

 

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